Tag: Relationships

#SessionConfessions: How Much Are You Your Own Worst Enemy, Self-Deceiving Yourself?

Leadership Lesson: In coaching sessions, it becomes apparent that no one should seek out new tools, resources, and ideas for their leadership development without first considering what is currently within their control but which they’re not…controlling.

You’re a very sneaky person — and you don’t even know it.

Typically, when things aren’t working out for us, for the most part, we look to the outside, to the external forces that could be holding us back. But really, there’s nothing out there that can hold you back and undermine you as powerfully as you can yourself.

Yes, you’re sneaky…with yourself!

And like I said, most times, you don’t even realize how much it (or you) works against you.

So, before planning for and tackling those…


In Your Development, How Do You Deal With The People Who Disagree With You?

Leadership Lesson: In developing our leadership, we need to consider the positions of all stakeholders at (or beyond) the table, even if they don’t agree with us, so that all points and possibilities can be at least considered and acknowledged – not necessarily appeased and conceded.

Coming face-to-face with those who don’t appreciate or accept your message might not be as obvious, open, and overt as these two instances in Washington in the last few weeks for Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell and President Donald Trump. Regardless, we should always consider why others don’t agree with us.

<<John inserts his usual


When It Comes To Integrity, “Playing Nice” Shouldn’t Mean Giving Up What You Stand For

Leadership Lesson: In order to remain as honest as possible, save time for all parties involved, and retain one’s integrity, it’s important to let others know when you disagree with them, even when it’s with a silent gesture.

At the U.S. Capitol memorial service for Representative Elijah Cummings, who died last week and who was revered by both sides of the aisle for his leadership over the course of his more than twenty years in the House of Representatives, one of his pallbearers, as he made his way through the receiving line of bipartisan congressional leaders, snubbed Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell’s handshake.

Check out the clip below.


What You Put Up With: What Does Your Toleration Threshold Lead To?

Leadership Lesson: There can be no growth or development forward if you’re tolerating too much, unwisely using your precious resources, including energy and reputation, to hold things together or keep appearances.

There’s just too much that can go sideways then drag you down if you put up with too much BS in your life and work.

In so many words that’s how I’ve responded to high school students when they’ve asked me what my tip from The Self 60, Monitor Your Tolerations, means.

The Self 60 is a list of 60 brief tips, originally created for students to keep in mind as they make their way through the next phases of their…


In Order To Get Better And Move Forward, We Should Eulogize More People

Leadership Lesson: Getting in the habit of telling others what you think about them (before it’s too late) can provide a sense of fulfillment in yourself, along with both confirmation and encouragement in them about the value of what they’re doing, who they are, and how they impact you.

No, this isn’t some veiled attempt at convincing you to take out the competition in order to get ahead.

And no, it’s not some kind of morbid wish for you and your friends, family, and colleagues.

If anything, it’s a request that you do more for each other and make each other stronger – by acknowledging each other.

Related: Your Leadership Wake: As A


When It Comes To Your Development & Growth, Who Do You Have To Brainstorm With?

Leadership Lesson: Everyone should have partners and colleagues with whom they can share ideas, in order to form a development ecosystem that allows them to harness, reshape, and finalize their steps forward.

What I always try to get people I coach – or anyone else for that matter who seeks to get better at what they do – to do is consider what resources they have around them. I want them to see – I want YOU to see – that one shouldn’t be limited only to what or who they have instant access to. That you have the right to seek out what’s best for you. And that you bare the responsibility to do that for yourself.

You owe it to yourself. Wait on no…


Loneliness Can Be Everywhere: Disconnection, Frustration, And The Need To Move Forward

Leadership Lesson: Realize the disconnection and frustration loneliness might truly present and that you need to make sure you’re searching for ways to express yourself and your needs, in your personal life as well as your professional endeavors.

“Loneliness does not come from
having no people about one,
but from being unable to communicate
the things that seem important to oneself,
or from holding certain views
which others find inadmissible.”
― Carl Gustav Jung

I came across the quote above recently, and it stood out in how we define, interpret, and understand loneliness.

It speaks to the general loneliness each of us can feel from time to time. We can read its words and analyze their meaning as it applies to our idea of and experiences…


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